So, on
Facebook this guy sends me a "Friend Request:"
William Percy 'le' Surprenant: Hello.. Saw your post on the Charlemagne page. From Chicago, like rockabilly? You seem a bit strange, however that may be from living in Evanston. I worked at Evanston Hospital back in the 80's.Okay, the guy has nothing in common with me, except that we're both descendants of Charlemagne and he once lived in Evanston, but I figure I'll get around to checking out his profile at some point and seeing if here is any reason to friend him. But before I can do anything about it, the very next day, he gets all impaitent and sends me this note:
William Percy 'le' Surprenant: Are you going to confirm me or not? Let me know..So I actually go and check the guy out. His profile reads like your typical right-wing ultra-repressed closet case. Late fifties, Republican, "political christian," and lots of anti-government groups and pages. No mention of a wife or kids. Obviously he missed everything on my profile about my being a Bolshevik, Catholic, just that I like Rockabilly and live in Chi-town. Of course — he probably also saw that I was bi-sexual. So, I figure I'll float a joke past him and see how he responds:
Dutchman: I don't know you, you said I "seem a bit strange," and now you're PRESSURING me to be your friend? If you need friends that bad, try Manhunt.comAs if to prove that he's a flaming closet-case, I get a reply almost immediately:
William Percy 'le' Surprenant: I
guess tha's your style, not mine. Now I see why I thought that you were weird. I am from Chicago and Evanston. That's why I "pressured" you. Sissy faggot...Dutchman: Let me get this straight: I'm the married fellow with three kids and you're the bachelor cruising men you don't know on the flimsiest of pretexts, but somehow I'm the faggot? Just so I understand, maybe you'd like to get together and call me that to my face?William Percy 'le' Surprenant: Wrong. I am married, with grown child. You are the one with access to gay porn. Name the place, fag!!!Dutchman: I can be found at the Eleven O'Clock Mass at Saint John Cantius every Sunday.William Percy 'le' Surprenant: I'm not going to "discuss" at a church with your people there. What the fuck's wrong with you? Come on BIG MOUTH! In the city. Time. Place. Weapon (your call). SERIOUS! FAGGOT. NO ONE CALLS ME OUT!!!Dutchman: Oooooooo! Little Percy is really mad! Look you closet-case, I've told you where you can find me. If you don't like that, then you name a time and place.William Percy 'le' Surprenant: You are going into an area that you know nothing about, and will highly regret. I am giving you fair warning..At this point I decided to do a bit of homework. I did a Google search and found that he had gotten into another flame-war on a Facebook discussion page. So, just to see if this guy could see how wacked-out this was becoming, I copied one of his posts exactly and re-posted it as my response to him:
Dutchman: Perhaps you are okay with being called names. Probably used to it. However, I don't take from anyone as you shall discover, especially from a pisspot punk.William Percy 'le' Surprenant: Okay enough talk Robert. I knoiw where you live. You will highly regret what you have said, no matter what else. Now, I want you to mee at the Pratt ave. pier, at the beach. I can easily drive down. Gotta be around sunset. You pick the night. COWARD.Dutchman: Robert? Who's Robert?William Percy 'le' Surprenant: We'll find you, COWARD. PUSSY. CUNT.At this point he promptly blocked me. But not before sending off two more nut-notes:
William Percy 'le' Surprenant: PUNK
Evanston Township??? Stupid pussy suburban asshole. I went to Lake View.William Percy 'le' Surprenant: We'll send you out of bounds prick!After that, he changed his profile to say that he was married, and put up a much more "dangerous" looking pic of himself!
This is a wretched, pathetic lie. Perthy is a big coward and everyone knows it. He sent his cousin to come after me, but the fellow was gay and only made a pass at me. The whole family seems to be pathetic. It's almost mortifying to think that he and I are distantly related descendants of Charlemagne.